Money is most useful when it supports the life you actually want to live. That is why discretionary spending deserves more than the simple question of whether something is affordable.

The better question is: even if I can afford this, is it a good use of my money for me? In other words, will this purchase bring enough meaning, enjoyment, connection, or experience to justify the dollars I choose to spend?

Think back on your own life. Early in your career, you may have reached a point where you finally had some discretionary income. You upgraded something – maybe a nicer car, apartment, wardrobe, furniture, or more expensive dinners – because it felt like a natural next step. On paper, you could afford it, and there was nothing irresponsible about the decision.

But perhaps the novelty wore off quicker than you thought.

Maybe that nice new car simply became “the car.” The nicer apartment didn’t meaningfully change your day-to-day happiness. The expensive clothes sat in the closet. Over time, you may have realized you were spending meaningful money on something that mattered surprisingly little to you. That contrast can bring the realization that responsible spending is not only about whether you can afford something, but whether it is truly worth it to you.

My own low joy per dollar story happened when I was a student and received some birthday money. A friend from my hometown visited me on campus and mentioned on game day that they had never attended a college football game. We went to the stadium on a whim, and I used most of that money on two tickets next to each other from someone selling seats outside a sold-out stadium.

Because we had not planned to go, it was nearly halftime by the time we sat down. It was cold and rainy, water was dripping from the ceiling above us, my home team was losing, and we spent the rest of the money on overpriced food. I remember wondering why everyone else seemed so committed to being there.

When I asked my friend if they wanted to leave early, they said yes and admitted they had not really wanted to go in the first place. I immediately regretted spending my time and money on an experience I assumed people were supposed to enjoy by default.

Since then, I have tried to be much more intentional about not placing value in things because other people do. That has led to spending habits that are more personal, more thoughtful, and more aligned with my own increase in joy per dollar.

Sometimes, when clients express a desire to spend a larger amount of money on something they do not strictly need, I can sense they are bracing for judgment. But our role is not to impose our own values on your goals. As long as the spending fits within the broader plan, we love seeing the pictures, hearing the stories, and helping you use your resources for the experiences, family milestones, and personal priorities that make life fuller. Once your needs are covered, talk with your advisor about the wants and wishes you would like to build into your financial plan. The goal is not simply to spend less – it is to spend more intentionally, so your money supports the life you actually want to live and helps you get more joy out of each dollar.